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Is this just growing old, or is this something more serious? How do I know when someone I love needs more help?
When someone you love starts acting differently, it can be hard to know what to make of it. While some changes can be normal with age, those that are out of character, getting worse, or affecting safety, independence, or relationships deserve a closer look.

When caregivers and older adults understand which signs are common and which symptoms are concerning, they can find the right support for their loved one.
Caregivers often notice small changes before anyone else does. A parent may seem less interested in their usual routines. A spouse may repeat the same question again and again. A loved one may seem anxious, sad, confused, restless, or unlike themselves.
Anxiety, depression, grief, dementia, medication side effects, sleep changes, substance use, pain, infections, or other medical conditions can all affect mood, memory, judgment, and motivation. A careful evaluation of what you’ve been seeing lately in your loved one can help sort out what is happening and what to do next.
The biggest thing to watch for is change. Is this new? Is it happening more often? Is it getting worse? Is it making daily life harder or less safe?
Maybe the person you’re looking after has been more forgetful, more withdrawn, more worried, or less independent in their daily routines. Maybe they are missing taking medications or paying bills, skipping meals, or pulling away from people and activities they used to enjoy. Maybe they just don’t look or sound like their usual self anymore. No matter what you’re noticing, it’s worth taking note of and talking it over with a specialist to rule out underlying causes.
Signs important to speak with a provider about
There are mental, emotional, and behavioral signs worth noting and discussing with a provider. Here are changes caregivers can look for and bring up at their loved one’s next appointment:
Mood and Emotional Changes
Mood changes in older adults are not always obvious. Depression may look like low energy, withdrawal, irritability, sleep changes, or loss of interest. Anxiety may look like repeated reassurance-seeking, fear of leaving home, or constant worry about health and safety.
Signs to look for:
- Ongoing sadness, fatigue, worry, fear, or irritability
- Feeling flat, numb, or less emotionally present
- Sudden mood swings that feel out of character
- Increased agitation, restlessness, or anger
- Loss of interest in hobbies, family, friends, faith, or community
- Pulling away from people or activities they used to enjoy
- Seeming hopeless, overwhelmed, or unusually anxious
- Grief that does not ease or starts making daily life feel impossible
Memory, Thinking, and Judgment Changes
Occasional forgetfulness can happen with normal aging. But memory or thinking changes that are frequent, worsening, or affecting independence are worth discussing with a clinician.
Signs to look for:
- Repeating the same questions or stories often
- Forgetting recent conversations, appointments, bills, or medications
- Misplacing items in unusual places
- Getting lost or turned around in familiar areas
- Trouble following steps in a familiar task
- Difficulty managing finances, mail, cooking, or household routines
- Poor judgment around safety, money, driving, or strangers
- New confusion, disorientation, hallucinations, or paranoia
- Trouble finding words or following conversations
- Personality or character changes
Daily Routine, Safety, and Physical Changes
Changes in physical health and mental health often overlap. A loved one who seems confused, withdrawn, or unlike themselves may need both a medical check and mental health support.
Signs to look for:
- Missing medications or taking them incorrectly
- Eating much less, losing weight, or skipping meals
- Sleeping much more or much less than usual, sleeping during the day and being up at night
- Trouble bathing, dressing, cleaning, or keeping up with the home
- More falls, near-falls, or fear of falling
- Wandering, unsafe actions, or leaving appliances on
- Increased use of alcohol, sedatives, opioids, cannabis, or other substances
- New fatigue, pain, headaches, digestive concerns, or other body changes
- Care needs are starting to be more than one person can manage
When to get help right away
Addressing some changes should not wait. Please seek urgent help if your loved one has sudden confusion, new hallucinations, severe agitation, unsafe behavior, chest pain, trouble breathing, or any talk of self-harm.
Call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room if there is immediate danger. You can also call or text 988 for urgent mental health crisis support.
It is also important to reach out promptly if after a fall, infection, new medication, or hospitalization, your loved one experiences a sudden change in health, especially if looking confused or appearing dramatically different afterward.
Common questions caregivers ask us and answers about changes to pay attention to
Here are some commonly asked questions about signs that something more might be impacting the person you care for, but feel free to call us anytime to talk over anything on your mind.
Other Resources
Want more information? Check out our related resources.


You can feel like yourself again sooner than you might think
Whether you or someone you care for has been feeling or acting differently lately, you don’t have to face it alone. Author Health can help you find out what’s causing the changes you’re experiencing and find solutions so you can feel your best.


















